"Let me help you with..." - well-meaning words which can sabotage trust and the development progress.
a protective, constant urge to assist in the details of your child's life; making every decision on the behalf of your child; feeling a strong, powerful attachment to your child which can result in mirroring negative emotions.
Allow me to vent for a moment.
I was teaching on the outskirts of Kyoto when I met my most memorable helicopter parent. She was a young mother in her mid-twenties. Her dark hair was pulled back into a stylish ponytail which bobbed constantly as she bristled around her five-year-old daughter.
You've placed yourself as the barricade and the ultimatum. It's not the weather which is preventing them from going outside, it's you. Choose your battles, and be prepared to carry an extra jacket wherever you're going. When your child mutters something about being cold, you'll be the saviour with the jacket.
It's like the switch-a-roo with decisions; 'I'm going to let you choose, but there really is no choice'. It is frustrating for anyone to be questioned once a decision is made, let alone have it changed by the person who posed the question in the first place. Step back when it comes to decision-making and let children choose between what's available. You might have found a new favourite food!
First, your goal was to communicate, and instead you dominated the conversation.
Second, you're meddling in their friendship life - that's their world, and you're only allowed to intrude so much on their social bubble.
Third, you've delivered another ultimatum: upkeep your parent's respect by following restrictions, or damage a family relationship by ignoring advice.
These three points are a one-way trip to feeling undermined and worthless. Instead, ask unexpected, open-ended questions which provoke thoughtful answers: 'If you could do one class again today, what would it be?', 'Why do you think your friend stopped playing that sport?', and 'If you were a teacher, what would you do all class?'.